Last year, in the late March Newspoll,
Rudd was top, Abbott in a hole.
His PR team did not despair,
Nor weep and wail and tear their hair.
They had a task they would not shirk.
Four months later had it begun to work?
His former rival, Rudd, was gone.
Now Gillard challenged him, “It’s on!”
And so this guy who loved to surf
Expressed his love for mother earth.
Now, in an election running,
Fitness counted less than cunning.
Still, lycra clad and on his bike,
He’d face any camera or mike,
And battle every ‘Big New Tax’
As if wielding his fireman’s axe.
No wonder that his pride was stung,
When after Parliament was hung,
The casting votes were not for him.
His view of that was very dim.
Early thoughts of ‘kind and gentle’
Were forgot as he went mental!
Not Cross Benchers’ preferred PM?!?
So what if Newspoll agreed with them!
In the House, suited, dutiful,
No more bare, bronzed and beautiful,
At division he still lost votes,
In spite of slogans, ‘Stop the Boats!’
That campaign too, long and heavy,
‘Gainst helping Queensland with a levy.
Forget lost ground on the NBN,
Now here’s a ‘Big New Tax’ again!
Gillard planning to price carbon
Roused him more than any hard-on.
Now he’d have his Peoples Revolt!
Then this Newspoll! This awful jolt!
Just when he’s proved the PM lied
He’s told his dreams of power have died!
“No!!!” protests Abbott, all defiance.
“Psephology? Crap! Like climate science!”