So the redoubtable John Howard
Has proved himself no coward.
Look, he’s stepped up to the wicket
To seek a role in worldwide cricket.
When first it looked as if he’d win
We saw again that old familiar grin.
Now he’s sounding sad and sour
On hearing he’ll not get the power
To control an international game
In spite of his domestic fame.
Perhaps that is the very reason
He’s not selected for this season.
Surely the ICC would not choose a
Man as leader, now famous as a loser
In cricket’s happiest home, Australia.
And now as if to underline his failure,
Here’s Gillard being oh so gracious,
A woman Howard knows to be mendacious.
He doesn’t want our new PM’s support,
Her name in headlines which for himself he sought.
Now she’s showing how to play the game!
Politics in Oz, it’s clear, will never be the same.
After all those years of ruthless sledging
What is there to show for all his wily wedging?
His team’s all out! There’s ALP incumbency!
The country has a female captaincy!
Fighting back, he’s coaching twelfth man Abbott
But even he is turning out to be a rabbit.
Poor John, his old touch seems to’ve lost its magic.
It’s time to walk. Clearly he’s not just a cricket tragic.